Sacrifice

chinadolli

April 25

I gathered handfuls of crystals
Chanted every spell
every meditation
Got on my knees and prayed for forgiveness and sanctification
I would have sold my soul just so what's left of me can have a good time
Give away a crown and go out of line
To feel fine for once in my Ife
I don't wanna live in limbo forever for a heaven or a paradise
I wanna feel alive at this time
When will luck be on my side?
Sick of people saying everything happens for a reason
I'd bargain with Poseidon for some kind of treason
Via dreams
Oh
What the fuck is wrong with me?
Bad luck just followed me
I did everything text book right
But it wasn't until i did it my way
That luck was seemingly on my side
Does it make me the bad guy
To live my life with freedom in mind
Why's it so wrong to love someone that feels right?
Why's it so wrong to share another night?
Why's it wrong to sleep in the arms of someone who makes me feel alive

Oh he mutters in my ear that luck is finally on our side
But it doesn't feel right to have to hide
If i stay will i have to make an impossible sacrifice
Doesn't feel like luck
Feels like now we're fucked ..
I know it's not just lust
Trapped in a place of mistrust
And obliviousness
War of heart and mind
War of spilt beliefs and needing to hide
Who am I alone at night?
When is it worth giving up a fight?
When is worth giving up on love for another ?
Why do I have to decide.
Why isn't love in itself enough?
It's not enough
It's not enough
The decision is tough
My life has spilt in half
I can no longer act....