As I sat down to glance through my journal and blog posts for the past year, I initially felt like this year hasn't been anything special. The passing of time has a way of blurring reality, which is great when harsh lines need to be softened but isn't so great when you want to remember the positives with clarity. There were goals I had set for myself that never came to be, which is often the case for anyone who makes resolutions or goals for themselves, and yet, there were still plenty of goals that were successfully achieved.
I competed in my 12th powerlifting competition, the third one since herniating a disc, and set new personal records in all my lifts. My bench press PR came in January in the gym at 145 pounds. Competition PRs are always exciting, especially for me as I have been slowly working my way back to my pre-disc injury bests. I have been adding to my squat post-injury PRs throughout the year, beginning in the gym in January (240 lbs), again in May during competition (248 lbs), and just this month in the gym (250 lbs). My competition deadlift was 303 pounds, only 5 pounds below my pre-injury best, and this is my current best. This was super exciting for me, but I am equally excited about deadlifting 300 pounds in training a couple of weeks ago, which is something I have never done before. In my sport, it isn't common to perform personal bests in training and especially not regularly. Even before the back injury when I had deadlifted more than 300 pounds a couple of times in competition, I had never lifted more than 275 pounds in training. So being able to deadlift or squat a nearly maximal weight in the gym without the adrenaline boost of a competition is huge, at least to me, and I am just as proud of those gym lifts as I am my competition lifts.
In June I did a fun 5K run and was able to finish in under 35 minutes when I was only hoping to finish in less than 40 minutes. Another goal was to read 3-4 books a month and I was successful there, too. Some months were barely 3 books but other months were easily 5 or more.
One goal I had for the year was one that I undertook with a lot of hope and a great deal of skepticism. I wanted to grow some tomatillos, so that I could make my own salsa verde in great enough quantity to freeze. With no real gardening experience and black thumbs, I hoped for the best and tended my little garden the best I could. And I'd call it a success! My four little plants produced more than 11 pounds of tomatillos which made more than 25 cups of salsa! I also planted red peppers and jalapenos. While the red peppers were so-so, the jalapenos thrived beyond what I ever thought I could use producing more than 120 peppers. I am so pleased with what I was able to grow this year and hope to expand my little garden next year.
My theme for 2023 was Living Stories. I don't think I did a great job living out that theme, although I went into it not really knowing how to make that theme practical. Even if the theme fizzled, I still feel a deep connection to it. Maybe that is why I am having a difficult time coming up with a theme for next year.
This year, like every year, has been full of ups and downs and all the in-betweens. The back has been feeling really good to the point that I believe the disc is fully healed; however, the nerve pain and symptoms in the legs/feet still remain, mostly tolerable but constant. I have had various aches and pains in other body parts: elbow, shoulders, clavicle, and hip. For a couple of months, I had almost daily headaches and bouts of vertigo/dizziness with no obvious reason why. My family doctor abruptly left practice in the spring, leaving me amongst the many, many without a GP, which also made navigating the dizziness and headaches more challenging. I finally reached the point of needing progressive lenses, and I am so happy to have made that change. After 5 or 6 years, we finally got around to properly fixing a ceiling repair in our living room. My husband and I celebrated our 31st anniversary. I actually went golfing twice this year and survived! I tried calamari at a restaurant last week for the first time since I was a teenager, and I actually enjoyed it. It is December 30th and I am still wearing my flip flops outside!
As I alluded back at the beginning, I haven't felt very inspired to write a year in review kind of post. Yesterday was a test day in the gym for me and I had been hoping to set new PRs, new all-time PRs actually, but it was not the day I had expected. For the first time in more than 6 years, I failed a squat, and that one would have been the PR. I had to call it quits early on my deadlift attempts before I was even finished my warmup sets, because the bar may as well have been glued to the floor and I couldn't budge it after 3 tries at one warmup weight. My body was feeling the best it had in nearly two weeks and pain was not a factor in any of the fails. For whatever reason, I just didn't have it yesterday and I was very disappointed. I know the strength is there. I know that every training session, test day or competition is not going to be perfect, and I know that those misses mean very little in the bigger picture. But disappointment weighed heavily on me all day yesterday. While I do feel emotionally lighter and brighter today, I can't quite shake off all of the disappointment yet. There is a sense of unfinished business that has to be put on the shelf for a while.
And so, 2023 is almost over and now I am facing the blank slate that the new year will bring. I am not sure when I will post my theme and goals, because I still need to actually figure that all out. However, with my birthday being on January 4th, I like to think of my birthday as the official start of the year, which gives me a few more days to organize my thoughts.
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