To see all the bullshit stories/rants/petty grievances of Kieran’s Humor go to https://kieranhumor.com. Look down when you are leaving the bar at the third world racquet club -- one of these steps is not like the others. It's blonde and has a slightly different pattern. That's the step where Nelson broke his face.
Nelson is one of the tennis pros. Some say he is a fucking American hero. You know why? Because he's been there for more than 7 years teaching summer camp, and he hasn't killed a single kid. If I tried that, it would be listed as an American atrocity. Those little "darlings" descend by the 100's on the 3rd world in the summer. Nelson stands out there all day in the broiling sun. It's the kind of sun that burns into your eyes and nose and just makes you want to kick puppies and strangle little shits. I remember a voice from my childhood: "You know, you kill a few and the others tend to listen for a while..." that's what my second cousin, Paulie, the New York City police captain, told me when I was 10. Was it last year or the year before, Nelson had back surgery because one of his hips hurt. The doctors never looked at his hips. They looked as his ample gut and decided it was his back. After cutting his back open and removing a disc didn't work, they finally looked at his hip. Once they saw that picture, they ended up replacing both hips. Fucking surgeons suck. In the middle of this medical travesty, Nelson was known to join us for a few drinks. Sort of -- he mixes beer and tomato juice. I don't know what you call that, but it's not fuckin' drinkin'. If you think this is funny or worth a read, you can tell Kieran's Humor that writing has value. Pledge a future subscription. You won't be charged unless they enable payments.
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Thursday, 10 April 2025
The Nelson Step
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