To see all the bullshit stories/rants/petty grievances of Kieran’s Humor go to https://kieranhumor.com. “Ohh Jesus, I can’t see it. Can you?” The wife asked as she held her phone as far away from her scrunched up face as possible. For the past two decades, I had always left the house with two glasses hooked over the front of my shirt: sun glasses to protect my blue eyes from the killer rays of Helios; cheap ass readers from Walgreens with anywhere from a .5 to 1.5 rating. “I thought I was just coming over to carry shit,” I said. “I left my readers at home.” We were making the first trip to clean out a friend’s house. Our friends have moved to their last stop. A small house with 8 residents who get whatever care they need short of a hospital. They clung to their 4-bedroom suburban home far too long. Now it’s up to the wife to make things right. She’s taking on their finances, selling their home and making sure they have enough to afford this final stop for as long as it takes. The wife didn’t expect to need the readers either. But she got the text message — “book your second covid shot NOW.” This was when covid shots were still hard to get and everyone of a certain age was “fighting” to get to the front of the line. ¹ She’s fucking with her phone, trying to set the appointment. “I can’t lose my spot.” She’s squinting and guessing. She passes the phone to me. “Does that say day of the week? or time of day?” It was just fuzzy black squiggles with a green border to me. I couldn’t even tell what website or form she may have been completing. She’s clicking and bitching. “I hate this little screen… this sucks.” After 5 minutes we just had to give up. She lost that appointment, but we got another one once we got home. We just had to throw on the cheap readers so we could see the actual screen. No Docs necessaryIt’s the second hard lesson I learned about readers. The first one was buying them. When I hit the big “4-0” almost two decades ago, I could no longer read my computer screen. I was sending out emails and presentations with “i’s, t’s, or p’s and g’s” all mixed and randomly matched. Fucking embarrassing. Read the rest at KieranHumor.com 1 Do you remember when people still had a lick of sense — before the conspiracy theories, and the nonsense led them to get medical leadership for a heroine addict, who eats roadkill, and had a worm eat half his brain? If you think this is funny or worth a read, you can tell Kieran's Humor that writing has value. Pledge a future subscription. You won't be charged unless they enable payments. |
Thursday, 9 January 2025
Useless readers
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