To see all the bullshit stories/rants/petty grievances of Kieran’s Humor go to https://kieranhumor.com. You know what is missing from the Bible? Apologies. According to the Google the only thing the fictional god of the bible ever apologized for: creating man. Genesis 6:6, NLT: “So the LORD was sorry he had ever made them and put them on the earth. It broke his heart.”Well shit. Is that an apology to man for making the earth so harsh? Or is that an apology to the earth for filling it with these assholes who are destroying it as fast as they possibly can? Neither, if you listen to most bullshit preachers, god’s just pissy that he can’t control people… and briefly wishes he had never created them. I’ve always pictured the imaginary Christian god, as a recovering drug addict in the longest rehab on record. His drug of choice? Power. “I made all creation, now bow down before me”, kinda crap… But out of the 12 steps, he’s stuck on step 8: Make a list of all persons we have harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.Maybe he’s too busy tracking every bad word in a massive celestrial swear jar? Maybe making tally marks for all the masturbation or gay sex or sex outside of marriage keeps his mind occupied? Maybe he just can’t keep up with all the touchdowns he has to create in every football game in America? So let me help out a little.
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Thursday, 5 September 2024
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