Step 1. Scream
Scream with your biggest breath
scream as loud as you can
red-faced purple-fisted mouth open wide
scream for hunger for warmth
let the cries fly from your throat
into the air, your pillow
as time tears at your
flesh and your mind
what a luxury it is
this siren
this nerve-jangling burst of sound
because if they have their way
you'll never be allowed
to scream like this again
not until another comes from you
not until fear wrenches it from you
scream, and never stop
Step 2. Bleed
Bleed from your forehead
bleed from your knees
arms thrown forward fingers splayed
the asphalt stigmata
blood hot, mingled with brine
weep blood between your thighs
bleed beneath your skin
Alexander/Hum/ 2
wild indigo blossoms
planted by kin
let the spindle prick you
so that the blood can rise
your tongue swabbing
the sins of your ancestors
from your fingertip
bleed with new life
bleed where no one can see
and when black thread binds
your wounds
just rip out those stitches
and bleed
Step 3. Burn
Burn with shame
cheeks ruddy and hot
Let lust singe your soles
as you dance with abandon on the flames
lips blistered heart scarred eyes flashing
chasing phantoms of want
praying for a way
to slake your hunger
unreasonable and unfathomable
this thunder in your soul
this rage untold
burn until your bones smoke
for your heresies
for your audacity
for your existence
burn, until there is nothing left
Step 4. Suffer
Suffer as you
bury your teeth into the spoon
splinters spiking your tongue
agony ragged like lightning
disappointment unmakes you
when the disease returns
when lies come into the light
suffer from neglect
invisible unneeded unwanted
the stares of contempt
lungs bursting to breathe
as you drown in grief
why you why now why this
doubt only drives the dagger deeper
you learn to live with it
as it slowly kills you
suffer the sand blown in your eyes
suffer as your body betrays you
suffer, and never let them know
Step 5. Sleep
Sleep, perchance to shed
the bonds of wakefulness
digging into your wrists
this dress rehearsal for death
you chase in the broken hours
you crave it like a lover
Alexander/Hum/ 4
heart drumming in your ear
pill-soaked dough-limbed heavy-lidded
this is the end
of the day the fight the light
sight turning inward
infinitely
you wait
for that gentle jailer
to tap your skull
and call for your release
this is how you want to die
asleep, without struggle or pain
asleep, nestled on the wings of night
to sleep, and fly back home...
To be human
it is thus
from beginning to end
to pass through
these dark things
only one day
to seep into the earth
like rain, so
do not run
do not hide
instead come, let us walk together
you and I
hand-in-hand
step by step
we will stroll
Alexander/Hum/ 5
to the terrible hum
of life
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