Maybe You Should Be With Someone Else (poem)

By chinadolli on July 1, 2024

Now that I know you're not reading
You don't know about the others...
Now
I can write with some more freedom
Now I can write
How I feel and what I know
You tell me to change my hair
You like it straight
You say you will pay
You tell me to get my lashes, my brows, my nails done
You want fake, not real
But you say you will pay
You used to like that I was shy
Now you hate that I don't look the waiters in the eyes
You used to find my quirks cute
Now you say it's missed social cues
You used to like me for me at least that's what you said
Now it seems you want someone to mold, instead
I know I'm not your type, those skinny white bitches that flirt with other guys is your type
You seem to think leaving you would be a missed opportunity for me, but you don't see all the sacrifices and preferences I overlooked to stay with you too.
Relationships are about compromise and loving someone despite the quirks or things you don't quite like...
I used to feel enough for you
Now I feel like I have to change into someone else to keep you satisfied
You seem to think that since you pay for me and buy me things it's enough to get a say in who I am.
But that's not how it goes.
You can't buy me, you can't buy love to mold it into what you want to be.
That's not how it works ...

But honestly, since I'm here
I wish I handled things differently
I wish I said
I wish you would gain 20llbs of muscle
I wish you went to the gym
I wish you ate healthier so I could eat with you
I wish you weren't so into music festivals cause I can only take so much EDM... God....
I wish you weren't so social and touchy with other people cause how am I supposed to trust you'll use good judgment when you're drunk or high?
I hate how often you get drunk and whatever...
But mostly
I wish you would stop giving a fuck about what other people think or say
Nobody cares that much about the things you think they do.
I wish you were taller
But those are things I don't say cause we all have to compromise on some things
But I would never say it cause I wouldn't try to change you...

In the beginning, you seemed to like me because I was different, but now you wish I were like everyone else... So maybe you should find that person that fits the description better. Maybe you should find someone else...