No spoilers
Butch:
Didn't play as I had an orientation zoom for Nugget's trip to DC. I have never seen a principal whip through questions so quickly. That man wanted to be there even less than I did, which is saying something.
I now have to go wrap up my latest sale, a three reel view master set of "prehistoric animals" from the 1960s. This is three reels of 3D pictures of some serious Land of the Lost fifth grade diorama cheap ass dinosaurs. Like BAD fifth grade diorama. Like C in art class shit. It's not even scientifically accurate! And someone bought it.
The moral is, someone collects everything.
Someone collects, dare I say it, vendor pens.
You're sitting on a fucking gold mine, my friends. A gold mine.
Loothound:
Think I had those exact dinosaur viewmaster things when I was a kid. Like someone just set up some toy dinosaurs in front of some model train landscaping stuff? I freaking LOVED those things. Hell, I might pay a little money to have them again just for the nostalgia.
As far as scientific accuracy goes, it was probably accurate enough for their understanding of things at the time. I was a huge dinosaur nerd as a kid (I even wrote a play about dinosaurs as a kid and made my friends act it out—even though it was literally just dinosaurs roaring at each other), and had tons of scientific-ish books from the 60s and 70s. The shit they said is WAAAAAAY different from what they say now.
I'd be interested to meet someone who collects vendor swag pens, out of scientific curiosity.
Butch:
That's the ones! I'd've saved them had I known. Now, they're off to the midwest.
Science has changed, that it has. I suppose I can forgive the inaccuracies.
The inaccuracies in the ones about "The Indians" however, are something else altogether. I can't bring myself to list that one. Even a gnome has some limits.
Like, at this book sale, they had a vintage, nice condition copy of "The Diaries of Goebbels." I couldn't bring myself to go there.
Loothound:
I don't have the viewing thing to see them with anyway, but thanks. Hope the midwestern person has a blast with them.
Glad you've got standards with your collectibles. Stuff from the 60s and 70s does often have some cringey bits where race and gender are concerned. A few of the children's books we have have things that make me wince a bit when we read them. Often makes me wonder what default beliefs and attitudes toward things now will be considered retrograde in 50 years…
Butch:
I dunno, man. How can we get any more liberal?
Of course, everyone always thinks that, right?
Anyway, you're married to someone who collects vendor pens. Don't believe me? Try to give one of hers away. She'll be all "C'mon, man! That's a fantastic pen!"
Feminina:
You want vendor pens? I got vendor pens. I usually restock the cups in the kitchen and then dump the rest on my colleagues at work. "You didn't get to go to Portland, but here's a cheap pen!"
They love that.
Butch:
Better than getting no pen! I should really get a cup. I tend to leave pens wherever I happen to have been. If I ever get into a life of crime, it will be a short lived career as the police wil just have to follow the trail of pens.
Loothound:
Oh, cups of pens live throughout our house. Bookshelves, windowsills, heck there's like four on our kitchen table.
I would be really impressed by a vendor whose pen read: My parent went to <<insert name of convention/trade show here>> and all I got was this lousy pen.
Butch:
Oh dude. That would be epic.
Add it to the list of blog merch we'll never make.
Feminina:
"My [whatever relationship] read PFTL and all I got was this lousy pen" is a bit out there, but I can get into it.
Loothound:
We'll start a whole line, and just brand them as "Lousy Pens." Can't do any worse than those inane "Life is Good" stick figures.
Feminina:
I like it!
The best thing is, the pens don't even have to work, since it's right in the name, so we can order the absolute cheapest crap out there.
Although I guess it would be an amusing twist if they were actually really high quality...
Butch:
Hey, I'm willing to be meta, but not expensive meta.
The grilling gnome shirt is Life is Good. Don't knock Life is Good. They made a shirt with grilling gnomes. I love that shirt.
Loothound:
Okay, fine. It just galls me a bit as a designer that they made so much money off of stick figures. Stick figures.
With the lens, though, we could make up some marketing lore to explain the name Lousy. Like, this particular style was designed by someone named Lousy or something. Kind of like the goose guy…
Butch:
Oh you can have the stick figures. But respect the gnomes.
I like where this is going. Every time I water and see the stump of the poor, departed pear tree, I realize our product line needs a boost.
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