As in water face reflects face,
So the heart of man reflects man. Proverbs 27:19
There are times when I see in my heart makes me feel terror, shame and guilt. Terror that after 40 years of serving God there is still such darkness inside. As often, but still the darkness in my heart terrifies me. There are times I feel shame because of the things I see in my heart. Know that in Christ he has already freed me from these things. There are times I felt guilt. Even though the actions are in the past, guilt sets in because I don't receive the forgiveness that Christ has already given me.
I have learned that when I am frustrated with others, it is really because their behavior reflects something in me that I don't like about myself. It can be hard to identify, but a friend pointed out a trait in one of my kids that was really irritating to me. She drew the correlation, as a result I was able to see myself in my child.
Since then, the first thing I try to do when filling irritated by another person's behavior is to look inward to see if it's really a reflection of a part of me. Is still working on, or trying to show me so that I'll allow him to work. And is the ability to see our own self and our heart that is the catalyst of inner work. How much we know about ourselves, but still so much we need to discover. It is my goal for every part of me to reflect Jesus.
Lord, thank You that I am a work in progress. Help me to continue the self reflection so I can surrender to You every area of me that does not reflect You.
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