When I was attending the Church's 12-Step program for the wives of porn addicts, we frequently reminded each other that "God has no grandchildren." What that meant was that we could not repent on someone else's behalf; our faith could not save anyone else; we could not be righteous enough to make someone else repent. It was a way of learning boundaries, since most of us had been trying to rescue our loved ones to the point where we caused a lot of chaos in relationships.
God has no grandchildren. Parents cannot save their children by being more righteous. Your spiritual experiences can't be transferred to someone, no matter how much you love them and how much you believe that you know what is best for them. Back off, and let the people you love have their own spiritual experiences and develop their own relationship with God.
The principle here is that your revelations are personal. Your spiritual experiences are not universal. I've concluded that this applies to people who think they're prophets too. President Nelson gets revelation for himself. I don't accept that his spiritual experiences have any relevance to my life. Other people, who have a testimony that he is a prophet, believe President Nelson's spiritual experiences have great relevance to their lives. That's fine. Their testimony isn't relevant to my life.
Do you see the boundary? Religious belief should be voluntary. Always. Ideally, there shouldn't be any fear-mongering about what God will do to you if you don't believe. There shouldn't be any pressure to believe what your parents believe, because you'll break their heart if you leave the church. There shouldn't be any pressure to live your life according to what someone said thousands of years ago. Unless you want to, of course. The only genuine spiritual experiences are the ones you've had yourselves.
Would this idea destroy organized religion? Maybe not entirely. It would certainly weaken the most authoritarian and fear-based religions, like Mormonism and Evangelicalism. More decentralized faith and philosophy structures might not be affected too much.
The LDS Church pays lip service to everyone gaining a testimony for themselves, but it quickly falls into guilt trips and manipulation if you don't have the right experience when you pray to know the truth. I served a mission, and I regret my narrow-minded thinking about my religious beliefs, and the ways I judged and even manipulated people. I was sincere. That doesn't erase the harm I'm sure I did. I did some good too, but there are some other things I wish I could undo. It wasn't my business to strong-arm people into accepting my religious beliefs.
The problem with religion is when others insist that you accept their religious beliefs for your own life. Religious believers need better boundaries. No, I don't need to believe what you believe. No, I don't care if you have a sincere religious belief that I need to believe what you believe. No, I don't care that the existence of people who disagree with you makes you uncomfortable. No, I don't care if you believe that God's wrath at the wicked will hurt the righteous too.
I posit that every religious atrocity throughout history is caused, not by the religious belief itself, but by the need to spread religious belief. Forced conversions, wars based on differences in religious beliefs, using religious beliefs as a form of emotional abuse and so forth. Most every evil done in the name of religion is done to force others to believe.
The only way spiritual experiences and a connection to God can avoid causing harm is to keep them personal. Share your experiences if someone wants to listen, but do it without manipulation and always give the person an out.
Questions:
- Did your parents pressure you to accept their religious beliefs?
- Have you parented your children differently in regard to religious beliefs, when compared to how you were raised?
- Have you ever received a revelation for someone else? How did that go?
- Do you believe prophets receive MORE revelation than other people? Is it different for modern-day prophets?
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