Dearest Rachel -
Every so often, I'm struck by the surprising fact that most of our holidays actually still track with the origin of the word – "holy day." Sure, almost all of them have been secularized and commercialized within an inch of their lives, but many of them still can trace their roots to a sacred celebration, whether pagan (Lupercalia, Samhain, Saturnalia) or Christian (St. Valentine's Day, All Souls Day/Halloween, Christmas, respectively). Others, like Thanksgiving, while not rooted in any religious basis per se, were still literally set up to offer gratitude to a Higher Power, and thereby contain a certain sacred nature as well. Even some of what we might consider to be "greeting card" holidays, like Mothers' and Fathers' Day, were created to commemorate and celebrate the role of individual parents; a literal enactment of the fourth commandment to "honor your mother and father." True, they've long since been reduced to a perfunctory tradition in some families – although in such a family, most holidays are so reduced, and even dreaded, and thank God (literally) that neither of us grew up in nor established such a family.
New Year's Day, however, was never set up as such. It's basically an arbitrary point at which one year ends, and another year begins. It's not universal, either; the Jews and the Muslims begin and end their years at different points, and using different calendars (which, being lunar-based, have to be adjusted even more frequently than the Gregorian one that we deal with). Even the date on our calendar hasn't always been where it is now, having been moved from the end of March to the beginning of January (and the scofflaws who still considered the old, traditional new year to be set in stone to celebrate were ridiculed as the original 'April Fools').
So there's absolutely nothing sacred about this particular holiday, right down to the date when it was set. You'd think it would be better suited to be set right on a solstice or an equinox, particularly that of when spring begins, and the earth awakens from the slumber in which winter had put it (although those in the Southern Hemisphere might take issue with that, in any event); or perhaps right at such point squarely between solstice and equinox, which would render Groundhog Day a more reasonable date to ring in the new year (which suggests that the Chinese may have had it right all along).
And of course, there's the fact that the entirety of the holiday focuses around a single instant in time when the calendar turns over, culminating in a sixty-second (or, more likely, ten-second – who really pays attention to the whole final minute? You're usually looking for your sweetheart to kiss, or swilling down your last glass of champagne because you don't have one) countdown to the very instant when everyone shouts out "Happy New Year!" Everything else is prologue (or if you prefer, pregaming) and recovery; and yet, we've decided to set aside a day for each of those activities, despite the fact that the moment of celebration is just that – a single moment. Why make such a fuss over such a small moment in time, anyway? It's not as if anything really changed in that instant, other than an arbitrary designation – which, admittedly, is necessary to make the passage of time; it belongs somewhen. It's just that there's nothing particularly special about it.
Which is why yesterday morning found me awake before six o'clock, with all sorts of ideas in my head. The problem was, some of them couldn't be acted upon, such as any plan involving going to the gym (something that my body is always grateful for – and my mind, otherwise preoccupied as it was, didn't really pay much attention to). Basically, I was starting the new year as if it was nothing more than an ordinary Monday, with all the usual tasks that I would take on in the course of a typical weekday.
At the same time, I have to pause to acknowledge the fact that, by treating the day like it was nothing special, I was making it be unusual in its own unique way. It's weird to realize that I hadn't been to my 'office' in at least three weeks, thanks to Dad's illness and the need I felt to be at his side just in case things took a turn for the worst. As a result, I had fallen almost a month behind in recording activity for both the church and camp (which becomes particularly problematic with the camp, since we have a couple of winter camp weekends coming up, and there've been a number of registrations putting needed to process). Not only that, but due to Dad's illness, mom has had to take the reins regarding their finances; while she's done okay with keeping up with the bills, she hasn't been able to reconcile the bank statements, and so enlisted my help. So yesterday morning had me doing 'office' work for the first time in three or four weeks, both for the organizations that I report to and the family in general; just like what I would have once considered to be an 'ordinary' day, only it was anything but ordinary at this point – and not just because I was doing it on a holiday, when most people wouldn't be.
On a more typical basis, at least for the way things have been this last month, I did spend several hours at the convalescent home with Dad – and Mom, who spends most of her waking hours there, quite honestly. Because of the day, Dad took advantage of the fact that I cannot quite keep myself from scrolling through my iPhone to periodically ask me about how the various bowl games were going (and, being a dutiful son, I would look those games up and let him know where everything stood. I may think it's odd to focus on sporting events at the moment that you're dying, but as that no longer currently seems to be an imminent concern, I can certainly understand the desire to find out), as well as various other news items of the day, such as the war in Gaza and the crisis regarding pirates, of all things, in the Red Sea. Of course, I would put these things aside whenever they received other visitors, unless they also proceeded to ask about the game.
But I was also using my iPhone, surreptitiously, to contact the girls and see if they might be interested in getting together. Going to the office hasn't been the only thing I haven't done in a very long time; we haven't gotten together as a group in what has to be several months at this point. And as long as we were dealing with a holiday in which everybody was off of work (regardless of my opinion as to why), why not take advantage of it?
And while they couldn't quite manage to assemble any sooner than on any other day, the fact that we all managed to get together at all I count as a bit of a triumph. More at Kerstin's insistence than mine, we managed to watch a few more episodes of Yorimoi together. While we were watching (in the bedroom, since the TV/computer setup is more robust – and the boys could go back to watching their own DBZ material, per their own preference), I explained about a few things regarding some of my own travel experiences and memories (since the girls in the show went to places that I'd been to), and resumed my pitch that we need to get out and travel together, since that's the only way I'm going to be able to carry on Dad's tradition of bringing the whole family along on a cruise or something like that.
I don't expect Daniel to start a family that I can take with, so these girls are the closest I have to a family of peers. Ellen, in particular, has admitted to a certain amount of amazement that it's now approaching seventeen years since she joined us on the Liberty of the Seas. Kerstin, for her part, has her own travel ideas that she made an effort to sell to the rest of us, and while I don't consider myself a snow sport enthusiast, I might be willing to consider revisiting Switzerland all the same, especially with an interpreter like her to guide me along. And Erin? Well, her trip to Italy with her parents certainly piqued her interest in travel, but for the moment she seems rather unreadable. Maybe she's just accepting of the fact that her work schedule is demanding, and she doesn't get that many vacation days to really go overseas. Maybe she understands the cost of such travel, and how much she'd have to save to do this or that (all while refusing any assistance on my part, which continues to bother me – can't she see that I'd want to do this for all of us? I'm not singling her out for special treatment, nor would I necessarily request any sort of quid pro quo from her). Oh, well. Just the fact that he could gather around and enjoy the show was good enough for now; if the idea continues to percolate in the back of their minds, so much the better.
And that pretty much sums up how "the holiday that wasn't" went for me (and everybody else around me, for that matter). I'd ask how your holiday was but – as much as I'd want to know how even an ordinary day goes for you – I figure that these days are paid even less attention up where you are than down here. So all I'm going to ask of you for now is that you continue to keep an eye on me, and wish me luck. As always, I'm going to need it
No comments:
Post a Comment