Just because we are adulting our children, fetishizing them, and treating them like grown-ass adults, does not mean they have the emotional intelligence to navigate dating or the sexualized climate they find themselves in at the tender age of twelve.
WTF
Not only are they not equipped to navigate the adult world and make adult decisions about sex and love, but we as their parents are not providing the necessary emotionally intelligent parenting that can support them. What in the world makes parents think, at twelve, their children can make intelligent decisions about their bodies and their sexuality when they are just coming into connecting with the workings of their bodies. Twelve is not grown, no matter which culture you identify with.
FYI, I am not talking about sexual identity or gender identity. I am simply talking about children being too emotionally immature to navigate dating at twelve. What would be a proper age? I don't know, and I don't think twelve is it.
Considering the number of women who are still unable to speak about how they were groomed and exploited at an early age. Will this next generation suffer from the silence of sexual trauma? Are we normalizing sexual and emotional trauma? Justifying it by saying, "We live in a different time?" What does that mean? Yes, our children have access to more adult content via social media, but that does not mean they have the emotional intelligence to think rational and healthy thoughts with so much access.
More is too much. Too many choices is too much. The more free and perverse (without reason) we get with our parenting or lack of parenting, the more lost our children become.
Teenagers with access to AK-47s as parents, parent with no clear boundaries.
Just to be clear, No Boundaries is ABUSE.
There needs to be clear and consistent boundaries or we run the risk of raising children who think being abused is a necessary part of a rite of passage. It used to be as simple as spinning the bottle, but now it is a full-on sexual assault by a man/woman old enough to be your grandparent.
We used to warn our children about the predators outside the home. We closed our eyes and ignored the preditors inside the house, inside the family, sitting at the dinner table. Now, now what do we say? Everyone at some point in their life has been sexually abused, it is a normal occurrence so we might as well pretend we have evolved? Accept it and move on like normal?
Noooooo.
The numbers are staggering. The number of children who are being trafficked, groomed, sexualized, fetishized, and abused. Our most vulnerable, are being sacrificed for profit.
I should stay off social media because this whole rant started when I saw a post that Blue Ivy, 12 years old, brought her boyfriend home and introduced him to her mother, Beyonce. I know I will make many of you mad, and I think Beyonce was pimped out by her father to Jay-Z for profit. I guess it is a practice as old as time. Why am I even talking about it? It seems our children no longer know the benefit of being children, carefree and protected by the adults who are supposed to love and cherish them.
Am I the naive ass-ho*%, who is stuck somewhere in La-La Land? This trajectory scares me as someone whose childhood was shattered by secrets. I am still fighting my way out of feeling gaslighted and led to believe I made the abuse up. Being ignored and dismissed by a family that is too fragile to hear the truth. A family too afraid to have a conversation that is healing and restorative.
Ignorance and fear are the opiates of the masses. No disrespect to Marx's perspective on religion ( that is a whole nother animal, don't get me started on organized religion) but fear and ignorance are powerful drugs.
I guess you could say it depends on the maturity of the child. And...there are so many other things a mature child can do besides date. Get a job, volunteer, or start a business. Seriously?
I need to remember this when I get a TikTok or YouTube itch!!!
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