HAPPY KARVA CHAUTH : A FESTIVAL TO CONSOLIDATE RELATIONSHIP BETEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE
Bhagwad Gita teaches us to see others as ourselves. In love when we see others as ourselves we will not mistreat them. To have the easiest of love relationships put the other person first and see how beautiful your life becomes.
Lord Krishna, tells us: I am the same to all beings, and my love is ever
the same; but those who worship me with devotion, they are in me and I am in
them. For if even one who does evil for sometime but laments his folly; were to
worship me with all his soul, he must be considered righteous, because of his
righteous way of living.
In Sikhism, the marriage is considered to be Anand Karaj (Act towards happiness) which is introduced by Sikh Guru Amar Das Ji. The act of marriage should bring about happiness, peace and prosperity of the spouses along with the family.
Bible too gives immense significance to the relationship between husband and wife and says: Marriage between husband and wife is union between husband and wife, they are required to live together in unity of mind and for a common purpose. Bible.
It has rightly been said that marriages are made in heaven and solemnized
on the earth thus proving that the relationship between spouses is considered
sacred one.
In Rig-Veda, it is rightly been opined: At the time of marriage the woman should preferably choose a man who likes her most and is delighted to see her. Parents should give freedom to the young girl to choose her life partner through the institution of Svayamvara, which literally means self choosing of a husband. Therefore, the relationship between two spouses is considered most significant.
RELATIONS BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE
Festivals in all forms & manifestations are numerous
Some are celebrated on the onset of pleasant season
Others in the memory of famous personages
Some to solidify relationships between love ones
While others are celebrated being of National importance
But there are the ones
Which are of immense significance
And stand for consolidation of interpersonal relationships
Between the partners in the family – the spouses
Along with other relations in the household
Thus assist in uniting the bodies, minds and souls
Karva Chauth, in essence, is one such festival of immense significance.
Marriage is the most sacred of all the institutions
But, of course, with attached duties and obligations
Which differ based on religions and cultures
Wherein the spouses
Unite to fulfill a common purpose
of keeping afloat the interpersonal relationships
With sanctified and formal biological relations
As per the cultural modes and traditions
Unite to fulfill a common purpose
Of procreation
To keep the civilization ticking
And then under parents' care steady evolution
Along with bringing up their children in the best way they can
Different cultures follow different customs
And cultural mores of behavioral patterns
To provide legal, social, financial, spiritual support
To each member with whom they have emotional bond.
As a reminder to consolidate relationship we value the most
That they have common goal at hand
To offer sincere prayer to Almighty God
For longevity of life-span of her husband
The women folks observe strict fast known as Karva Chauth
Karva means an earthen pot
It is tastefully painted/decorated
While Chauth means day fourth
A festival falling on fourth day of Krishna Paksh.
There are varieties of traditional
And cultural modes which are followed
But each has the common purpose
To enhance the emotional bonds
Between the two spouses.
While a strict fast for the entire day is observed
The women folks do not take anything
Not even a drop of water to quench their thirst
For this is the holiest day for them
When the women folks pray to God
To grant longevity to their husbands & entire family
Along with peace and prosperity
Besides good health and wellness aplenty
So that all live a life full of care for each other
While fulfilling the purpose of their lives
This day too is considered as the sacred one
To renew the promises made
While solemnizing their marriages
And thus establish a relationship
Which could withstand any hardship
Which may come in the way.
While the couples perform their multifarious functions
As husbands & wives – partners with a huge difference
To care of their family effectively
With a common objective of transferring traditional modes
To make the family fabric a rock-solid one
That while good relationship between spouses is significant
But when this happens with the blessings of our Lord
Our home becomes in reality a heaven on the earth
Since the bounties of Almighty God are exceptional
Since there is no expectation but suffused with love & affection.
LETTHE LOVE BETWEEN REMAIN ENDURING
LET THE LOVE BETWEEN HUSBAND & WIFE INCREASE FOR WELLNESS PREVAIL FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY
Karva Chauth is the festival for consolidating the relationship between
husband and wife wherein the wife keeps a strict fast for the safety and
prosperity of her husband with a prayer to Almighty God that He may bestow full
protection to her husband against any incident. This fast also reminds us of
the vows administered at the time of marriage. This festival is also called as
SANKAT CHAUTH, where SANKAT means tolerating or facing entire difficulties
while observing strictest fast.
MARRIAGE AS A SACRED INSTITUTION IS THE HIGHLIGHT OF THIS FESTIVAL
Marriage as an institution functions to its optimum when both the spouses
have the intention and inclination for its success. In this, both the spouses
are equal partners. If one partner considers other one lowly and inferior then
this institution totters and collapses under the weight of its contradictions.
Marriage succeeds on the basis of understanding, compatibility,
accommodation, no skepticism of any sort, be sympathetic to the need of other
partner, be considerate and sympathetic to the pain of other partner and devising
ways and means to alleviate such pain. This pain may be individual one or
created due to some other emotional upsurges while performing multifarious
functions in the family fabric. This emotional upsurge may also be due to
either of the two partners' parents related or based on some incidence which
happened prior to the marriage. In other words, understanding other partner's
viewpoints and being a partner in assuaging, addressing or solving the problem
consolidates the foundation of marriage as an institution.
My wife has been observing this festival for the last 41 years and I know
how much love and affection we have for each other along with my love ones are
having while following all these rituals from morning till late evening. Beya
or gift is also given to mother-in-law by the wife and both of them (husband
and wife) pray for her (Mother-in-law's) long life.
LOVE BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE SPOUTS WITH TRUST
Karva means earthen pot (mainly a spherical earthen pot and paint the same
with different colours so as to beautify it) and Chauth means fourth day – a
festival which falls on the fourth day of fortnight or Krisha Paksh of the
fourth day of Kartik (Full Moon – Poornima) according to Hindu Calendar.
In some parts in India, wheat is kept in the Karva (pot) because of wheat
sowing season (Rabi crop cycle). On this day women folks observe strict fast
for the long life of their husbands along with pray for the peace and
prosperity of their entire family..
CONGREGATION TO RELATE THE OLD-TIMES STORIES CONCERNING THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS DAY
The married women sit in a circular form, exchange their metal dishes
(thalis) which contain prayer materials (Puja Samagri) and adornment /make-up
materials along with a lightened earthen wick etc which is exchanged with other
women sitting in the group.
The married women also exchange their views on the difficult rituals which
are strictly observed during observance of strict fast lest something bad
happens to their husbands. Women also relate old-times stories concerning the
importance of this festival in the form of songs. These stories highlight the
importance of this festival. In other words, this festival signifies the
importance of love between husbands and wives – a festival for fostering bond
of love between spouses.
I WITH MY WIFE WITH MY GRAND SON
The main purpose is to showcase with utmost sincerity the importance of
spouses (Husband & wife) in their lives. The songs are sung in the praise
of Lord Shiva-Parvati (Shiv-Shakti) and Ganesha with traditional fervor and
devotion to earn their bountiful blessings for the well-being of their husbands
and in turn their families.
FESTIVAL FOR CONSOLIDATION OF RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN SPOUSES
This festival symbolizes the consolidation of relationship between husband
and wife and also with others in the family. Not only in the family, the
married women consolidate their bond of friendship with other women in the
neighborhood by making the common friends (Sahelis) with whom they exchange
their beautification materials such as bangles, bindis, sandoor pot, ribbons
etc. This s the bond of friendship of feminine with not only their husbands but
also other members in the household including the neighborhood.
Now-a-days, even the fiancés are observing fasts for their would-be-husbands
for the safety and progress.
Karva Chauth is one such occasion on which the ladies observe fast for
their men-folks for their wellbeing, pray to God for their longevity besides
keeping the tradition which has long been observed in our society. The ladies
observe fast without taking anything – means without taking water or any
eatable till the fast lasts. This fast is observed very strictly. On this pious
day, the ladies put on their best attires with ornaments and pray for their
husbands' long life and good health and wellness. In some cases, the husbands
too observe strict fast from morning till it lasts.
ORIGIN OF THE FESTIVAL
On this festival is observed in Northern Part of India. It is believed that
the grown up men-folk used to go for military campaigns leaving their families
at home. Their wives prayed to Almighty God for their husbands for their return
safely.
LEGENDS CONNECTED WITH KARVA CHAUTH
There was a woman named Karva. This woman was loyal to her husband. During
bath in a water-body, her husband was caught by crocodile. Karva bound the
crocodile with a cotton yarn prayed the Lord of Death Yama to spare her husband
and send the Yama to hell for his misdeed. She was so much so devoted to her
husband that the Lord of Death had to agree to her entreaties. Such is the
effect of fast with purity of mind and soul. Also, it gives credence to the
fact that if we perform anything with sincerity and singleness of purpose then
we can have mystical results; which we least expect in our lives. On the other
hand, if we perform any ritual or keep fast just because others are keeping
fast so do we; by so doing, the very purpose of fast gets defeated.
STORIES ABOUND ABOUT OBSERVANCE OF FAST
There was a queen named Veervati. She observed fast while she was at her
parents' house. Due to strict observance of fast, she felt it very hard to be
without water. Her seven brothers felt for the life of their sister and created
an artificial moon. She took water due to which her husband died. She offered
prayers to Lord Shiva and Parvati for restoration of the life of her husband
since he died because of the fault of her brothers. With their grace, her
husband's life was restored. Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati appeared in person
to her and advised her to observe fast very strictly.
LEGEND CONNECTED WITH ARJUNA
There is also a legend connected with Arjuna and Draupti of Epic
Mahabharta. While Arjuna had gone to the forests for his strict penance, Draupti
observed strict fast due to which Arjuna's task was achieved without much
difficulty.
STORY OF SATYAVAN SAVITRI
The story of Satyavan Savitri is well known. She was one of the daughters
of a king. She was very pious lady. She remained absorbed in meditation. She
was more devoted to God due to which her father thought that she did not love
him. He wanted to teach her a lesson. He married other daughters to the most
suited grooms and she was married to a poor leper named Satyavan by his king
father. Being of poor health he could not survive for more days. When Lord Yama
came to get Satyavan's soul, Savitri requested him to spare his husband's life.
He refused doing so. On that day she had observed a strict fast. While Lord
Yama was taking the soul of her husband, she followed him. Finally, Lord Yama,
after seeing the steadfast attitude of Savitri, asked her for a boon. She asked
for nothing but the life of her husband which was ultimately granted by the God
of Death.
OBSERVANCE OF STRICT FAST
Married women observe strict fast from the early morning hours, without
taking anything including water. They take fenis (Made of wheat flour) along
with some eatable water in the early morning (before sun rise) and subsequently
observe fast for the complete day. The sargi is prepared by the mother-in-law.
They pray for the safety of their husbands. They wait for till seeing the moon.
They see their husband first before seeing the moon through a sieve. Then the
husbands help their wives to take some water. The wives pray to the Moon God
for the safety of their husbands and pray for their lives and also that they
may shine like the Moon.
PRAYER FOR GOOD WHEAT CROP
The wheat is kept in the earthen pot which coincides with the prayer for
good wheat crops.
EXCHANGE OF MAKE-UP MATERIALS BETWEEN MARRIED WOMEN
The women in the evening hours collect in the courtyard and sing the
praises of the deity for the safety and prosperity of their husbands. They also
exchange gifts mainly the beautification materials or make-up materials
(shringar) and other home- made sweets. All the women observing this fast put
on their best dresses specially made for this festivals.
While ladies of the household observe the Karva Chauth strict fast as a
festival and an annual celebration for the well-being of their spouses, it is
in the fitness of things to draw out some lessons from their endurance,
conditioning, steadfastness etc.
EMPOWERING WOMEN
The married women keep fast, observing all the strict rules of this
festival, not taking even a grain of food, fruits or even water during the
observance of fast, we should all introspect, how much these special creations
of our Creator endure without whom there would not be any continuation of
civilization. Are the men-folks giving anything tangible in return which they
deserve!?
Then, why should we not do something concrete so as to empower women and
should not take them as a second class citizens as some of us take them to be?
Then there are the cases of rapes, maiming, throwing acid on the faces and even
killing for not succumbing to their untenable pressure tactics. Special laws
should be made in order to aware exemplary punishment for those who take law in
their hands and exploit the women folks.
It is an undisputed fact that men and women work for the wellness of their
families, therefore, it is essential that both enjoy freedom of expression and
action without coercion from any quarter. Nothing should be done to browbeat
the women folks or show disrespect to the women.
It has been said that those households who do not treat women honorably and
do not pay due respect to them, such homes do not have holistic growth and
development. They lack grace of Almighty God. Therefore, the women folks should
have their due share of respect in different societies and should not be
treated as the playthings to please men-folks.
My sincere prayer to the Almighty God is to bestow all peace and prosperity
besides this Holy Day of Karva Chauth may consolidate the bond of relationship
between husbands and wives till their entire lives .May the Lord Ganesha remove
all the obstacles in the path of smooth relationship between spouses for peace
and prosperity in the family.
My fond prayer to Lord Ganesha is to bestow peace and prosperity globally so that all human beings have mutual trust, love for all, feel pain when others are in pain and have mutual trust with the principle of 'LIVE & LET LIVE' and establish a domain wherein all could subsist with humane touch.
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