 | The Lightkeepers Journal Jul 1 |
Often when we read or write about the D/S lifestyle, the focus is on big-picture themes such as consent, safety, and experiences that have happened while journeying down the lifestyle rabbit hole. This is wonderful because so many of these imperative topics need to be discussed, however, the little things are big things when it comes to lifestyle dating and relationships. One of the simplest little things is good morning and good night greetings. When a partner makes the time to say G'day or sleep well, even if they know the other person is still awake or sleeping, expressing to someone that they are the first thought of the day and the last thought before drifting off to dreamland is not only amazing but reassuring no matter what one's role in the lifestyle. A thought for d-types, it should not be a 'rule' that your submissive, if apart, text good morning/night because this little action is a great barometer of how the s-type is feeling. While they may have just dozed off without warning, the lack of a good morning can also be a way to sense the submissive is struggling, stressed, or "Houston, you have a problem". Lastly, these expressions should be desired not mandated. A d-type should be excited to wake up and wish their s-type a good morning just as a submissive should be motivated to wish their dominant sweet dreams or vice versa. When one tumbles around lifestyle sites, one of the things noticeable about the single and seeking or just keeping an eye out is they will often list all the kinkerrific things they are or are not into. Understanding what fetishes are turn-ons and those that cause someone to barf in the mouth a bit is important, there is a little thing much more important and that is affection. Are you a romantic, a hand holder, a lover of cuddles, casual non-sexual touching, passionate kisses, or a make-out-like-a-teenager kind of person? While it is important to be on similar fetish pages, the little things of 'romance' are more important than what kind of chandelier someone prefers to be hung from while being spanked or doing the spanking. Discussing big-picture lifestyle topics is darn good, even when discussing big bad wolves yet just as important and often overlooked are the small things. The little things can cement a bond between people or cause a connection to fizzle out. Bigger is not always better and without the little things, no relationship is going to last, so do not ditch the small items on the quest for a big time lifestyle partnership. What little things are most important to you in a relationship? As with all of my writings, please see this disclaimer. ©TLK2023 |
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