You are in every fiber of my heart and soul Sitting in my place behind the laptop and aware of the memory of us. When we moved, we started here, in this room with the beautiful view every morning. The same view that I have enjoyed for the past few years through all seasons. You have not been able to enjoy the transition from winter to spring. The trees that get greener in the months of April and May. I am also aware of how grateful we are for the opportunity to move here. A transition that came in a period of saying goodbye and adjusting. Declining health for you with all aspects of it. Surrender to no longer being able to function independently was the hardest. And yet accept every day and be grateful for it. And now it's been 6 years without your presence here in the house. Your physical farewell that got closer and closer after we took our place here. Made it our home, together, in the belief that we did the right thing. The peace it gave me to know where I would have and keep my home. Important to trust in this in the last phase of your life. The place you hold in the hearts of everyone you held dear. It hasn't worn off over time. Sometimes it feels like it was just a short while ago. But then I think about everything that's happened since you made your transition. In my life and that of our children. And also on the great stage of the world. It shows that we are already 6 years further. Through these years we also celebrated a lot together. Moments in which your presence was also very much missed. Still palpable, when I go somewhere alone without you around me. Not even a look of understanding over the heads. Or the wink and your warm smile, full of love and trust. Missing the team feeling that we were together and still are, different from before. How deeply connected we are through all distance and time was made very palpable and clear to me last night. The moment I walked to my place behind the table, it was like your presence in the bed of that moment. Across time and distance, to be suddenly confronted and remembered. The depth of the energy that suddenly manifested. The sadness and deep pain of your physical and emotional struggle. It took my breath away, it brought me to tears and back in time. The moments when I looked at you, from the chair, and you were absent. In your attention directed inwards, looking outwards. I then wondered where your thoughts were taking you. What the battle looked like inside, knowing that life was finite. The pain of the crumbling of your physique. It touched me deep in my soul. Hit to the bone in all its rawness, all these emotions overtook me last night. The deep sadness of having to let go of your loved ones, Leaving Me behind, knowing how much grief would have to be processed. Your presence is felt to the depths of my being. I couldn't help but breathe through it and let it pass through me. In acceptance and love for the strength and courage it cost you. I'm sitting here now behind the laptop in your place from back then. I feel your presence in the moments I write this. Or I suddenly hear the whistle while I'm in the kitchen. Your way of making me aware that you were awake and showed your love with it. Tuned together in a telepathic way, where the silence was not just a silence. The energetic aspect of the loving connection that goes beyond borders. I wanted to put words to it today. Ascension Day has just passed, and it also feels like everything is closer. Together in the process of letting go and healing. Letting the surrender to this go through me through the breath. Not holding on to the sadness or pain that manifested. Feeling it through and paying attention to it, until the softening came. Total surrender, for both of us. High Self @RheaDopmeijer (c) Heartfelt Messages, May 28, 2022
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