The holiday season has arrived and with it we have to make an important decision: how much can we add to our lives before we go crazy, get overwhelmed or can't keep up with it all? I know, each year someone says they'd like a nice, quiet Christmas, and yet somehow while they may steal a couple of quiet moments they still have tons of events and meetings on their to-do list. It's almost like a tradition, that we say we're going to not do much and end up doing exactly the opposite. Going back to the question, the good thing is that we don't have to make just one decision about whether we're going to try for a overbooked holiday season or we're going to try to tone it down some, we can make those decisions throughout the month of December.
Lately I've been noticing my use of the words "and" and "but" in both my writing and speaking. They're interesting words because sometimes we can use them almost interchangeably, but usually one of them is more appropriate or better conveys the message than the other. While it may not matter in some situations, in others it definitely does because it may mean that you're adding things to your plate or limiting what's on your plate. Depending on the success expert you talk with, they'll either recommend that you say "yes" to everything (a version of the "and" we've been talking about), or to be very selective using your "yes" (a version of "but" (I'd love to help you but…)). Of course I'm in between both of those, that I recognize that you can't make progress without saying "yes" and "and", but at the same time have never subscribed to the idea that you have to be everything for everyone and jump on every opportunity or idea just because it pops up in your life.
Going back to our holiday example, do I believe we can say "yes" and "and" this holiday season and still emerge on January 2 with brain cells and energy? Yes, I believe we can say "yes" to a whole lot of holiday fun and "yes" to ourselves and our sanity and knowing our limits: "Yes, I'm going to attend that party on Thursday night and I'm going to stay home and watch a holiday movie on Friday night with a hot beverage." Or: "Yes, I'd love to get together with you this month, but do you think we could do lunch one day instead of going into the city for a whole evening?"
I would say the success lesson here is knowing your limits or the limits to which you're willing to push yourself. Over-the-top can be fun, but not usually all the time, so wisely choose which over-the-top, balls-to-the-wall, 20-hour-days you commit yourself to both in this season and in general. You don't want to come out of the holiday season or success journey saying "I think it went well, but it could have been so much more…" or "That was way too much and I wish we had slowed down/reconsidered…" It's not about a balancing act specifically, but about being present in the moment and learning to trust your judgement and experience on when to say "yes, and…" and when to say "yes, but…" even if it means sometimes backtracking and (within reason) changing or updating plans. What things help you realize when to say "yes, and…" or "yes, but…" or even "no thanks!"?
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