Betul Erbasi posted: " Hi everyone! Happy Sundays! This week, I want to talk about the lack of perfection in life: there is no point in life where everything will be perfect in the way we understand life. When I think about each phase in my life, I can find many goo" Wise & Shine
This week, I want to talk about the lack of perfection in life: there is no point in life where everything will be perfect in the way we understand life.
When I think about each phase in my life, I can find many goods about each phase. But I cannot find a phase where everything was good. For example, let's say in one phase, my career thrived and I was financially well-off but I was alone. In another, I was not alone but my health was not in good shape. Why is it that there is always something that does not come off as a good thing? I can think of several things:
One is that our perception of what is good and what is bad is not sustainable. Oftentimes, what we consider to be a good thing turns out to be harmful to us. Breakups are a good example for that. We see them as a bad thing but often they happen for a reason and eventually, we might feel grateful that it happened. So, maybe, we are not lacking anything that we need at that time but it is our perception of a perfect life that hinders us.
Another is that our brains are conditioned to protect us from dangers. Even if everything is perfect, the brain looks for things that might pose a threat to our safety and pulls out the most minor things and focuses on them as problems. That focus makes the so-called problem bigger and bigger, to a point where it makes you forget all the good things we have at that moment.
I am guilty of both and I thought about how we can manage them. I think training our brains to feel safe is a major task, but a difficult one. Likewise, training our brains to see the good in 'problems' is a major task, but a difficult one. Yet, I think these are what we can strive towards.
Why do you think that most people never seem to have perfect times in our lives? Are there other reasons you can think of? What are some other solutions we can try? Let's discuss.
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