RelationDigest

Tuesday, 2 August 2022

[New post] What’s Your Goal?

Site logo image Laura posted: " This week a question was posed to me that sounds a little odd in this world of instant results, social media and fast paced living that I thought was an important one for us to consider as part of our success journey. The question? What if the goal is no" Laura Dickey

What's Your Goal?

Laura

Aug 2

This week a question was posed to me that sounds a little odd in this world of instant results, social media and fast paced living that I thought was an important one for us to consider as part of our success journey. The question? What if the goal is not brevity? Absolutely, there are time limits on things for a reason. I'm sure that a book or movie or speech would be good if nothing got cut out of it, but things get cut for a reason. I'm sure your story would be great if you told me the full version with all the details, but do we need all those details to understand the story more than sufficiently and understand your experience? Do we need every single good idea that you write down in your lifetime completed? Do we need to take days on something that could be accomplished in a more-than-decent way in a couple of hours? Of course the answer to all of that is no, we don't always have to go the distance on everything. But what if we took our time on things occasionally or asked a different question about how much something needed to have/be?

And that's really where the first question comes in: what's your goal? Is your goal to share a very consumable daily insight? Is it to share a serious chunk of research? Is it to answer a question? Is it to give people a break? Is it to solve a problem or fix something? Is it to build relationships? Is it to build skills? Is it to satisfy hunger or quench thirst?

Which brings us to the second question: how much is necessary to accomplish that goal? A consumable daily insight is usually much briefer than a serious chunk of research both in time it takes you to create and in time it takes to consume. A question can be answered simply (it costs $10 for a 3lb bag of frozen blueberries) and sometimes an answer needs more details before it can really provide an answer (what are the differences besides price on those 3 bags of frozen blueberries). Sometimes people need big breaks (they're usually called vacations or mental health days) and other times a short break is sufficient (like a trip to the coffee cart outside the building or a bath at the end of the day). A broken toy may need to be repurchased (and the broken one thrown out) or it may be glue-able or it may need new batteries to be fixed. Do you need to be together 24/7 for a month to build a relationship or can you do it with meetings and communications over a year (or more) of time? Can you build your skills with a couple exercises a day (in an app or with a different tool) or do you need to spend a solid chunk of time on something to really build the skill? Can you satisfy your hunger with a frozen waffle or is a pan of French Toast started the night before with bread you bought several days ago what's necessary?

So what if the goal wasn't brevity or immediacy or "just the facts ma'am"? What if the goal was to have an experience, or to make a memory, or to share beauty, or to understand a culture or to build lasting wellness habits? In some of those cases time or length gets taken out of the goal equation, because it may not matter if you spent 2 minutes toasting a frozen waffle or several hours making a pan of French Toast as long as everyone is around the table on Christmas morning to love each other, be together, share a meal and celebrate the holidays. So the next time you embark on a success goal be open to considering and planning for more than just how fast (and cheap) you can get a decent job done to reach your goal.

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