I'm 25 , lost and without a life goal. What should I do?

nelacanovic

Aug 1

The first thing I would suggest is — don't panic. It's likely there are many other people in the 20s (and 30s) who don't really think about life goals. There are so many things happening in our 20s. There's the transition of leaving high school and going into university, and it's like entering a whole new universe. In many ways, you start from the beginning: new school, new courses, new circle of friends, new social rules. Often this means leaving the family home, so you have to start learning new skills like how to take care of yourself, prepare meals, keep your apartment (or dorm room) clean, and manage your time to stay on top of studying.

It doesn't leave a lot of room for goal-searching.

Still, at some point you will look towards the future and ask yourself what it is you should do next year, five or ten years from now. Here's when you can start contemplating having not one, but several solid goals. It will require you to spend some time by yourself, with a notebook and a pen, because you will want to write things down.

Think of it as an exercise in getting to know yourself better.

What can be helpful?

#1. Instead of just this year, think about what you want to do long term.

Ask yourself the following questions to define your goals properly:

Where do you want to be 10 years from now? It doesn't have to mean a specific location, but rather how you see yourself in terms of types of skills you want to have or skill level you want to reach.
Who do you want to become professionally? As an adult, you'll learn to be financially independent and self-sufficient. What do you want in terms of a career and in which field (medical, engineering, retail, education, service industry, etc.)?
What would be an ideal lifestyle? Do you prefer living in a big city or in the countryside, do you want to be an entrepreneur or work for a big company, would you prefer to live alone or with others, what would you be doing in your spare time?

#2. Start making a list of goals that are specific, not abstract.

Don't think about your goals as ideas that are vague. If you do, your brain won't know what to focus on. Here are several examples.

Non-specific goals can be anything of the following. I want to get a job in the future, or move out of my parents' house as soon as possible, or get super fit, or earn millions.
Specific goals are spelled out. For example, if you're starting a job search, write down that you want to get a job offer for a [insert job title you want] that pays an annual salary of [insert amount you believe is fair given your skills and experience] so that you can develop [insert current skills and new skills you're working on].

#3. Have a clear understanding of why you're selecting a specific goal.

Instead of making this goal-setting exercise an obligation, turn it into a choice. Tell yourself, "I really want to see myself succeed in this area!" The benefit? It gives you a greater sense of control about what you're doing. That's much better than feeling like you have an obligation to work towards someone else's goal (for example, a goal set by parents).
Remind yourself why you are choosing a specific goal. Make the connection with the initial reasons for working on something to begin with. It can be to learn a new skill, solve a problem that you've had for years, pass an exam to graduate from college, start your own business, etc.

#4. Don't leave it all on paper — plan to take action.

So let's say you've been brainstorming possible goals you'd like to have. Where do you go from here?

Select 2-3 goals that you think are the most important for you. They can be career-focused, skill-focused, or something more personal like getting fit.
Under each goal, write down 3 things you need to do on a consistent basis.This could be to practice a skill three times a week, do research on companies where you'd like to work, or schedule a 30-minute workout every Monday and Thursday.
Create a schedule for the week ahead. Set aside small blocks of time to work on the areas you've identified. In the first week, you may only have 15 minutes. That's OK. You can gradually build up to 30 minutes a day, or one hour. The idea is to make the transition easy and not overwhelm yourself with the amount of tasks you need to do.

#5. Measure your progress.

After one week of implementing new activities that are going to help you reach your goals, make an assessment of your progress. Be honest in answering questions such as:

Which activities took longer than I anticipated? Why did that happen?
What was easy to do? Give yourself some time to identify activities that weren't as difficult or intimidating as you previously thought.
What could you have done better? For example, which shortcuts could you have used?
How can you improve? Does one activity need a bit more time or more preparation?
How will you measure your success? Will you set milestones to reach at the end of each week? How can you track your progress — in a journal, spreadsheet, or calendar?

I created an e-book on this topic called 5 Ideas for Setting Realistic Goals. It's a 35-page printable workbook with step-by-step instructions, templates, and a list of recommended reading materials. You can learn more about it here.