There are three types of people in the world, murderers, victims and witnesses. Murderers are ruthless and step on anybody for their own gain. The victims get stepped on by the murders. I am definitely a witness.
I did have a period of Camus where I did wonder about the futility of life. You know, the usual whats the bloody point of it all. I know that not drinking alcohol, not drinking caffeine, stopping chronic pain medication and living a less stressful life has helped to improve this. I suppose when I also stopped trying to strive and hit life deadlines this helped too. No atomic habits or getting up at 5.00am for me!
I was walking my dogs as I do every morning on the same 45 minute route today. It struck me as I looked at the wildlife and scenery that actually that planets life of flora and fauna just goes on around me, without regard to me, regardless of what I do during the day, that I am just a passenger on a short journey on this planet. I am really happy with that thought mind you.
I just want to go about the rest of my life quietly, undisturbed and un-disturbing, only the latter is down to me I know. I don't want a new kitchen, a second house a high paid job to pay for it all. All I want is a life where I have choices, the choice to work, the choice to ride my bike etc.
It's not what I own that gives me peace of mind in life, its having the freedom to make my own choices. Choose if I work, choose if I buy a new kitchen or not. Having choices is the luxury of the 1st world I realise that. Many people around the world are forced into situations for survival. But speak to many middle class or wealthy people and they started life poor too. I live in some hope that in some way poverty is not always a trap that there is mobility. There are less 3rd world poor in 2022 and although wealth is concentrated at the top, the wealth pool is infinite, meaning that the wealthy elite does not need to be at the expense of the poor. Although I do believe myself that they (the so called wealthy elite) should pay much more tax. If I only we could trust governments to spend tax's wisely eh!
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