The experiences of competing, not the winning or the losing that's, the purpose in this! Translated…
My daughter became a member of the badminton squad for a year now, and finally, in the summer of her third-grade year, she had the chance of competing. As I'd learned, that the coach's list of competitor had her name on it, being the smallest in size, lacking the experiences in playing, the most important thing for her to do in this competition, was to watch, and learn, to expand her experiences, to personally get into the competition, to feel the air. I'd prayed: I hope that she could do her best, but, won't let winning or losing get to her.
The process of her very first competition was too important, I'd originally worried she might be too nervous, and feel fearful of competing, the day before she was due to compete, I'd found her to me, wanted to give her a pep talk, to help her adjust her mind, to give her a ton of boost of my positive energies. But my daughter responded back to me all relaxed, "I'm so excited, it's like a fieldtrip!" and so, I'd, swallowed all my pep talk I'd originally planned, back, down, not a word was needed from me, good, she is in her mindset, I got no need to worry about her.
the serve...photo from online
The following day, my husband who'd accompanied her, sent me the photos of her in competition every now and then, so I could, participate in her activities. I saw that in the middle of the court, my daughter who's petite, with her hand on the racket, without any facial expressions, competing with a much taller opponent before the nets. The referee had to bend down to speak to the two little girls, that was such a cute sight. The game began, my daughter took one huge step, leapt up, smacked the shuttlecock, netted, the shuttlecock fell out of bounds, serve, picking it up, serving it again, picking it up, again………the game ended, too quickly, only a few short, minutes.
In those few short minutes, inside that square court, the serve, the receive, no pause, no dialogue, and, the air of the members of the spectators were held in, the hoorays sounded off, then, fell, silent, again. I couldn't guess what was on her mind during those few short minutes. But a thought fly by my mind: ah, could it be, her own, realm?
Recalling back to my own sports competitions, track in middle school, volleyball in high school, basketball in college, I'd not started competing as young as my daughter had, and I was a part of the whole group, and we all shared the wins, the losses, together. While in the badminton competitions, it's the players winning the points one by one by her/himself, waving those rackets hard, to get those points scored. My daughter, with the racket in her hand, walked toward her own, competition. I couldn't share any experiences of that with her, nor could I be there, to help her, release the pressures she was, feeling, she had to, go up against, an opponent, all by her, self, to experience, to get through, the competitions.
Or maybe, I'd preset it that she is to lose the game, or that I'd believed, that she didn't need to, beat anybody, she's there, for the, experiences of competition, to think how she was, going to, chase every ball, then, the opponent wasn't, an, opponent, any, more. And so, this real-time, was a realm of all her own. Started from nothing, no baggage, just to feel that first step out.
My husband told me, that after the game, as she came off the court, tears started falling, the coach noted it, gave her words of, encouragements. I really wanted to know how she was feeling at the time. I'd inquired when she got home, was she upset she'd, lost? Was she worried, or scared? Was she, blaming herself for not playing, well enough? She'd told me, it's none. Until bedtime, when she'd finally, sorted through all of her own, emotions, she'd told me, she was, a little bit, moved that the moment she'd walked off the court, she'd realized, she'd just, finished her very first competition, and reached the goal of earning at least five points in the game that the coach had set for her, she'd scored seven points.
I'd first, started, chuckling, felt that my daughter was, very, optimistic! Then, I'd started, crying, recalling how a year ago, when she was totally against getting into the teams, and look at her now, no matter if it was experiences in competitions, or growing stronger in her own mind, she'd gotten, way, ahead of, me already.
And so, this is how far your daughter had come, and, the point of these competitions is not to win, because, the competitors had played a hell of a lot longer than you, and it's just to get you to experience what it is like, standing on the ball court, to be in the game that's, the most important, because this will feed to your experience, if you continue to play on, and compete more times in your future.
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