On the Relative Value of Loot and Merchandise

Feminina O'Ladybrain

May 27

Minor spoilers for some side stuff in Horizon: Forbidden West

Butch:

OK! Shelf is back! Hooray!

Did Kotallo's thing. I was expecting....a bit more. I don't know why. Seemed rather short and to the point. I guess Kotallo is that way. I did rather like that he decided not to use it all the time. We've been talking about how this game treats people who are not "normal," as it were. Boomer, the blind guy, Kotallo, and how all found their place in life without us "fixing" them. Nice to see the game stuck with that even for an important NPC.

Then did Alva's thing.

Why did they give the cutest character the most annoying companion quest? That climbing was annoying even by this game's standards. I even had to cheat! There was this one part where I was on a beam, and there was another beam, and there was a ledge, and I tried and tried and tried to get to either with no luck. "Must be the jumping mechanics!" thought I. Tried SO MANY TIMES. Got SO MAD. Then googled and no. There was a beam to pull. Even knowing it was there I could barely find it.

I was SOOOOOOO MAD.

Also....why did we have to wait on that one? We couldn't do it until after "Wings of the Ten." I kept thinking "OK...now we fly. No? OK...NOW. No? Uh...." There was no flying. There was ropecaster and fight and climb. Why'd we have to wait?

This game does odd things sometimes.

Feminina:

Yeah, I also kind of liked that Kotallo was all "yeah, this definitely works," and then took it off. It's a useful tool and good for fights, but not actually part of him, and he's come to terms with who he is when down one arm, and doesn't need to 'repair' himself to feel OK. I liked the various depictions in this game of people accepting their own differences and being accepted by others...this is just how it is sometimes.

Even the harsher cultures, like the Tenakth, who traditionally write off anyone who's not physically perfect and ready to battle at all times, seem to be reconsidering a bit. At least in my case: I sided with the woman as leader in that big battle, and then I was talking to her later and she mused about how "I wonder if there's another way besides constantly fighting each other to the death" or something.

And yeah...climbing that damn tower with Alva was super annoying. So many times I'd fall off and have to go back up! A few times I intentionally just fell to my death instead of hitting the glider, in hopes that I'd start closer to where I'd been, but usually it just reset to that floor with the lobby. Sigh. Climbing, man. Brutal sometimes in this game.

Butch:

And then, after all that, she's just there all "Hi Aloy!"

Bitch.

Game, when your PC says "Whew. Glad that's over," the climb was too far.

Feminina:

Yeah, someone who worked on this game really, really, really loved climbing.

I mean, I like climbing myself. I enjoyed much of the climbing in this game. But there were those times when it just went on and on, and it was so very, very picky, and you had to repeat so much if you missed a jump...somebody must have thought that was great.

I don't know who, though.

Butch:

Or you had to see the damn thing you had to pull with a ropecaster that DIDN'T SHOW UP ON YOUR FOCUS!

Speaking of that, also did that "fly up and fight a stormbird and find armor" thing that we got forever ago. Could. Not. Find. The. Armor. Aloy kept being all "Maybe my focus will see something" as if, after 85 hours I don't know that, and, as if it actually would see something. Sheep. It saw sheep.

Took. Me. Forever.

I also fucking hate stormbirds.

Feminina:

Oh yeah, damn, that stormbird was a jerk. And fighting it on a mountaintop was an extra challenge, since I kept falling down inclines while running around fighting with it.

Got the damn armor in the end, of course. Because I am a badass.

Butch:

As did I.

Also annoying was trying to jump out of the way, ending up grappling to my loyal sunwing who then started flying the other way because I can't really steer my loyal sunwing very well.

Aloy: Stupid shock stuff I'll just jump and-

Flying Roach: Hey boss!

Aloy: Dude! Turn around!

Flying Roach: Wish I could boss!

Feminina:

Ha!

I mean, that's terrible, but also kind of funny. Poor Roach.

Butch:

It was so annoying.

Luckily, the stormbird waited patiently, and didn't heal. If it had healed, I would've killed the sunwing.

Which I almost did. I kept losing track of the stormbird, seeing a flying thing, shooting the hell out of the flying thing, only to realize it was Roach.

Feminina:

Yeah, I loved my loyal sunwing, but there were definitely times in combat when I wanted to scream "go fly around somewhere else, you're freaking me out!"

And there were definitely times when I'd be falling off a cliff or something in combat, freaking out not because I was afraid I'd die (I have a glider!), but because I was afraid if I got too far away from the thing, we wouldn't be in combat anymore and then it would have healed up when I got back.

That only happened once, with that frostclaw or whatever on top of that mountain, but MAN I was annoyed at having to start all over again. I redoubled my frantic efforts to stay close enough to everything to keep the combat active in every battle after, I can assure you.

Butch:

Man, healing enemies SUCK.

I did a couple of those frantic "try not to get too far off course" deals when I fell doing Alva's stuff. Ironically, once, I did that and got caught in some nook in the building and couldn't get out and had to restart.

Because of course.

Feminina:

Oh man, that happened to me at one point! I was crammed into some crack in the wall and couldn't escape. It happened a few times here and there and usually I could jump/move/punch my way out by frantically hitting buttons until the situation resolved (just like in real life!), but there was one time I just couldn't get loose and had to restart.

Unexpected dangers of the game world. Environmental hazards!

Butch:

That was rage inducing. Sucked, because I like Alva and wanted to like her quest.

Feminina:

I do like Alva. She's wildly enthusiastic about information, so pretty much a librarian's favorite patron.

Butch:

HA!

She'd likely drive you nuts.

Feminina:

No, I was being serious! We do like people who are enthusiastic about information! Nothing as disheartening as getting someone some information they asked for and having them not even care. Like, why did you even come in here asking about this topic if it's so tiresome? (I know, I know...the professor told them to.)

Butch:

Fucking professors.

Still, I bet someone who wanted to know every scrap of human knowledge would, eventually, burn you out.

That's a lot of knowledge.

Feminina:

Well, yeah. But I'd cheerfully point her in the direction of all the data we had and tell her to knock herself out.

Which is pretty much what Aloy did, actually.

Butch:

Aloy: Red hair, freckles, and, essentially a librarian!

No wonder you like this game.

Feminina:

I also love pointless loot and hate giant robots! It really couldn't have been any other way.

Butch:

You don't really love pointless loot. As someone who is now obsessed with eBay, no way you'd buy an old peanuts printing plate for 400 bucks.

But man, as I sort through my dad's collections for eBay, I'm glad such people exist.

Feminina:

Well, no. But that's not loot, that's merchandise. Loot, as in stuff you can get for free, is a passion of mine, as shown by the stuffed bag of vendor pens, totes, lip balms, flash drives and random other swag that I bring back from conferences.

Of course, I give most of it away to my co-workers who weren't at the conference, because once I get it back to my lair/office I realize I don't actually care about it. But the looting impulse is very, very real.

Butch:

Hey, it was free to me! Like an ancient sculpture.

To quote Dr. Seuss, "I said to the Lorax you poor stupid guy, you never know what certain people will buy!"

Feminina:

True! It was loot for you!

And, like you, I would happily have taken it and then sold it to someone else who wanted it more. Just as I do with vast quantities of the loot I pick up in games.

Congrats on finding that person! The internet is a wonderful thing sometimes.

Butch:

Now if only I could find someone who wants all these rotten wontons.....

Feminina:

Me me me!!!!

I'm not giving you any money for them, though. Just come by and strew them around my yard, I'll get them.

Butch:

Only if no one bids on them.

Feminina:

Siiiigh...farewell, little wontons. You are surely lost to me now, what with all those vintage food collectors out there.

Butch:

Have hope. I'm getting no bites on my broken rakes.